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Dear The Magic Rain team,
I met my girlfriend at a cosplay event and she is a cosplayer too. Usually, she is so happy go lucky and supporting whenever we have a new cosplay, but lately she has become very emotional and angry at me. I always hangout with her and talk to her everyday, but I don’t know why she is still so angry. I always ask her what I did wrong, but she refuses to say anything to me. For me, that means I don’t have any problems at all, but I just noticed that I always neglect her texts. Like when she starts it first but I don’t know how to reply, to the point where it depresses me because I’ve failed. I’m such a noob. Until now, I have failed as guy in treating women properly.
Hi there confessor,
You’re really lucky to have found a partner who shares the same hobby with you. Here’s the thing, when you said: “I always ask her what I did wrong, but she refuses to say anything to me”, the truth is when your girlfriend is giving you the silent treatment and tells you that “nothing’s wrong”, believe me, most of the time something is wrong. In fact, here are other phases you should be aware of (http://www.lifebuzz.com/9-phrases/) and should not ignore or take lightly when your girlfriend does say it.
Moreover, according to what you said: “I just noticed that I always neglect her texts. Like when she starts it first but I don’t know how to reply, to the point where it depresses me because I’ve failed.” Maybe the reason why she’s ignoring you or giving you the silent treatment could be because she feels as though you do not care enough to reply her? Though it may be difficult to reply, try to show her that you are present and that you’re listening by sending her an emoji or even replying “oh cool!”, “I didn’t know that”, “okay”, or even “talk to you later” is fine too. Sometimes all you must do is remind her that you love her. Small gestures like telling her “good morning dear”, saying “I love you”, or even surprising her with something handmade would make her feel appreciated.
If you feel as though you’ve failed as a guy to treat women properly, now’s the time for you to make it right. If you’re still together, there’s still a chance for you to work things out. Try to speak to her and tell her that you want to talk it out; not because you’re wondering why she’s ignoring you, but because you care and that you value this relationship and never want her to be upset. By doing so, she may begin to try to fix the issue between the both of you because of your efforts. Good luck!
Dear The Magic Rain team,
I really do enjoy cosplaying and dressing up as my favourite characters. It makes me feel really happy, and I put in a lot of effort to portray them. However, I feel like the entire cosplay community dislikes me due to mistakes I had made in the past. I have tried to change, but either they never saw it and judged me for my past mistakes, or I fell for temptation and repeated the same mistakes over and over again.
I feel like the entire cosplay community can bond by talking shit about me and hating on me, which affects me making new friends, as people who do not know me well will hear shit about me and refuse to befriend me because of that. Someone once even said that the cosplay community would be a better place without my existence, which is pretty much indirectly asking me to leave. As a result, I no longer have the courage to go for ACG events anymore, which I used to enjoy, and I am also unable to look for photographers to do photoshoots with me. Thus, leaving all the costumes I have to rot, which I honestly find a waste. I feel like this joy in my life is being stripped away from me and I feel like a sinner, constantly being judged by people. No matter what I do, it is never good enough for them. What can I do to not repeat my mistakes again and have everyone accept me, so that I can happily cosplay?
Hi dear confessor,
I’d like to help you on your issue but first I’d need to know what “mistakes” have you made. If you are able, can you send in another confession with some details? Only then can I help you address the root of your issue. Thank you.
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